A few days ago, I had a daydream that there was a support group for people like me (which I just discovered has an actual name).
I was feeling so alone, so sad and so frustrated with the pain I feel from temperatures I experience as cold – but no one else does.
In my daydream, I go inside a building to find a support group office for people like me who are ‘painfully allergic to the cold’. I’m looking forward to meeting someone else who might understand.
The building has many random businesses and suite rooms. As I walk through, its cold from the air conditioning. I’m cursing the A/C as my body starts to hurt. I start wishing again that A/C was illegal! The sharp stabbing pins and needles start into my skin. My hands go cold as ice.
I’m out from the heat of my car and quickly into the A/C building. In a flash, I go from totally relaxed and comfortable to feeling tense and in pain. Ugh. Argh. SO TIRED OF THIS!!!
Finally, I see the ‘Raynauds’ office. I open the door and walk in. Whoa…wow….ahhhh! Relief and respite. No air conditioning! What? It’s warm. Like 80 degrees at least. It feels just like when I’m alone and can sit in my hot car with the windows all rolled up – feeling ‘hugged’ by the air. I love it when it’s 87.
The gal behind the desk has rosy cheeks, is peppy, happy and warm – without being dressed for a snowball fight. She smiles at me and I smile back.
I snapped out of my daydream and realized I was crying. Tears just streamed down my face. Angry. Frustrated. Stuck. Limited. Alone. NO ONE UNDERSTANDS HOW MUCH THIS HURTS! Inside and out both.
So, now here I sit…Googling. I found you. I have lots of stories, but I thought I’d tell you this instead.